would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
Randomize
