mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
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