the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Where is the hickey?
Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize