Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Your topless pictures make me question reality
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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