Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (213): View more from California

  Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (213): Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train. http://tfl.nu/ldtk
  Replies (39) Good night (574) Bad night (2141)
• Favorite

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.

  (1-781): View more from Massachusetts

  I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (781): Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning. (1-781): I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon. http://tfl.nu/wxu1
  Replies (19) Good night (6040) Bad night (577)
• Favorite

  (210): View more from Texas

  I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (210): I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV" http://tfl.nu/w3he
  Replies (37) Good night (5350) Bad night (744)
• Favorite

  (254): View more from Texas

  I'M GETTING MARRIED!

  (512): View more from Texas

  YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (254): I'M GETTING MARRIED! (512): YOU'RE STILL MARRIED! http://tfl.nu/48vu
  Replies (38) Good night (4429) Bad night (2289)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom. http://tfl.nu/hv59
  Replies (5) Good night (793) Bad night (3330)
• Favorite

  (561): View more from Florida

  if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (561): if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat http://tfl.nu/bqtg
  Replies (40) Good night (5541) Bad night (1144)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (732): Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend. http://tfl.nu/3lzx
  Replies (20) Good night (976) Bad night (4222)
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (920): My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed. http://tfl.nu/bpdu
  Replies (17) Good night (1243) Bad night (5050)
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  no, that is not a typo

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (401): i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night (401): no, that is not a typo (401): i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday http://tfl.nu/nleu
  Replies (50) Good night (6600) Bad night (2161)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (203): Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being. http://tfl.nu/247a
  Replies (13) Good night (3622) Bad night (1287)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding

  (1-513): View more from Ohio

  Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (513): They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding (1-513): Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that http://tfl.nu/r0yq
  Replies (3) Good night (1275) Bad night (522)
• Favorite

  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (262): Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy. http://tfl.nu/dejh
  Replies (7) Good night (1702) Bad night (824)
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  Let's get weird.

  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  It's 10 am...

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  I'm assuming that means you're not busy...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (920): Let's get weird. (608): It's 10 am... (920): I'm assuming that means you're not busy... http://tfl.nu/aihn
  Replies (3) Good night (1398) Bad night (312)
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.

  (1-215): View more from Pennsylvania

  ...

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (215): I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward. (1-215): ... (215): I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure. http://tfl.nu/h70g
  Replies (5) Good night (865) Bad night (321)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  that happened

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (508): Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing? (603): that happened http://tfl.nu/dxuy
  Replies (1) Good night (215) Bad night (384)

Randomize