White coat. Heels.
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?