we're blogging at a bar
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
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