Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
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