she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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