Walk of Shame. In a state park.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
