Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
Randomize