worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
Randomize
