Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
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