I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
That accounts for only three of the penises
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
