I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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