No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
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