I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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