How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
