I have demons in me.
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
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Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
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Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
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