therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
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