my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize