kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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