I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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