you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
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