yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
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dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
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