genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Randomize
