I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Randomize
