she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
