I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Randomize