I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
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