I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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