that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
I stole a fireplace last night.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
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