He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Randomize