tod's in jail
he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
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