Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
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