K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
