Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize