I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Randomize
