How'd it feel making her break her religion?
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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