Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Randomize