I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
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