It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Randomize