No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Randomize
