There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
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