Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
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