question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
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