You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
So much rum. So many feels.
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
I'm like, not good at living.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
