I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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