ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Randomize
