i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
