How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
Randomize
